Hey dere mon.
Donda, he say I be excited, and I am, but tings also suck, you know? We trolls no longer be favourites in da Horde. We be fourth class at best. Vol'jin perhaps be a bit silly and confrontational when dealin' with Garrosh.
Oh, and da Shattering was *frightening*! Dere we was on the Echo Isles, rebuilding, when this great big tidal wave came bearing down on us from da east. Tidal waves absolutely *suck* when you be on a set of small islands.
Still, we Darkspear trolls be survivors, and dis time were no different. We scraped tings back togetha again, started rebuildin' again, and we're on the Echo Isles again. Also supposedly we be in da Horde, and Vol'Jin tell us we need to stay loyal to da Horde, but half da trolls you meet dese days are fed up with da whole mess. We was followin' Thrall. Now he's who-knows-where and we gots Warchief Cle fthoof-Dung-For-Brains instead.
De big news, at least for me, is dat I now a druid! Once we Darkspears were all set up on da Echo Isles, Zen'Tabra started her teachin'.
Sadly I had ta say goodbye to my pet raptor George. I left him wit' de raptor trainers and I'll get him as a mount a bit later. De trainers, dey say he really fierce, and I'll need to be a whole lot more seasoned than I am now before I can get him back as a ridin' raptor.
Anyhow, so now I be a druid!
Some news about trolls druiding is dat, well, Zen'Tabra told a little lie. Back when we retook da Echo Isles from Zalazane, she said dat de troll druids been around for a really long time. Truth is, troll druis only been around a few years. Da lie was told to spook Zalazane. Considering he dead now, it was a very useful lie but we don't need it no more.
Druidin' be weird, you be workin' wit more than one loa at a time. Before, your average troll would work wit' just one at a time. But Zen'Tabra, she were contacted by Gonk, the raptor loa, tellin' us da world is in a right fine mess and we need to work wit' nature and all de loa of de earth at once. When de raptor loa tells you dat, it be time to listen, and act on what he be sayin'.
De night elves were surprised by us troll druids though, dat for sure!
I been concentratin' on adventurin', and helpin' to clear up after da Shattering and Durotar went and gettin' half-flooded by all da waves. So's I not been concentratin' so much on writin' about my adventures. I find I got twenty two seasons under my belt already! And Donda, he were wantin' me to write about druiding from my very first season. Whoops!
So here I am, writin' about my first seasons of druiding.
Startin' out
De Echo Isles, dey comin' along nicely. We got a *huge* trainin' area for all de new recruits. De first few seasons, they were all about trainin' to be a druid, and the proper balancin' of speices populations and suchlike. Sometimes you gots to be nasty and kill a creature or two or ten, but den, Nature is sometimes cruel and nasty too.
After I was done trainin', I helped out wit' de raptor trainers, and then the naga, along with the twice-damned Sea Witch, invaded the Echo Isles!
We Darkspear, we're survivors... but this time, we didn't have to run to survive. We done enough runnin'. This time we stood and fought!
'xcept, we young'uns weren't quite powerful enough so it was mainly Vol'Jin fightin' the Sea Witch, and us runnin' around and helpin' by keeping other nasties off his back.
I tell you, seein' her dead body flop down like a sack of raptor eggs was really quite somethin'. She took Sen'Jin from us, she drove us from our homes, and we finally gots some revenge at last.
Vol'Jin also told us a bit about his history wit' Warchief Clefthoof-Dung-For-Brains. Seems Vol'Jin and Garrosh had a bit of an argument, and Vol'Jin went and all but gave Garrosh a death threat. Not de smartest ting to say to da Warchief.
Vol'Jin also contacted Thrall, and said he was tinkin' of leavin' da Horde. Thrall said a lot of tings dat, basically meanin' no, and Vol'Jin is reconsiderin'.
"I was bein' perhaps a bit rash and angry," Vol'Jin told us young trolls. "But even though Garrosh got raptor guano for brains, he might still be able ta keep da Horde together, and we got ta be strong members of da Horde."
Me, I wonder a bit about Thrall meself. He says he done been havin' trouble wit' keepin' da Horde together, but he seemed much better at it than Garrosh Hellscream ever could be. And Thrall says Garrosh be strong enough to keep da Horde together, but does Thrall know about us trolls now bein' fourth-rate citizens? Does Thrall know about what happened wit' Cairne Bloodhoof? Does he know about Garrosh leadin' us all down de dark road of war, dat de orcs been down before?
To Sen'Jin village, Razor Hill, and Durotar
So after de battle wit' de naga, and Vol'Jin tellin' us ta be good little members of da Horde, it were time to head out into de world.
Sen'Jin village were next on da list. Dere not much to say about my old stompin' grounds, though it were nice to see a flight master dere. Dis makes it much easier to get around Durotar.
De Alliance drove out all de centaur from south Durotar, which is nice, but now dey're settin' up down dere and plannin' to attack us and Orgrimmar, which is bad, so it was time go show dem whatfor.
Also went ta Razor Hill, meetin' Tednug and Scratchfever on de way. Dey say he had something ta do wit' de Echo Isles, Zalazane, and Mankrik's wife, Razor Hill, and finally de Crossroads. "Best ya don't know," he said ta me and walked on.
From Razor Hill I got some missions to patrol around Durotar and help people in trouble because of da floods.
To da Crossroads!
Eventually I was sent to the Barrens.
By all de loa, de Barrens gone and been right shattered. Dere's a great big canyon in de middle, splitting the north from the south. De south seems a bit chaotic and overgrown, from what everyone been sayin', but I haven't gone down there to check yet.
I started off at Farwatch post, on de very edge of da Barrens. Dey was impressed wit' my abilities and had me defend a supply caravan on its trip to da crossroads. Dere was human bandit attacks, and quillboar attacks, and dere was a stop at dis farm which I can't remember much of 'xcept for the fact I met the legendary Mankrik. He got a bit of a thing about quillboars, understandable as dey killed his wife. He had me kill a whole lotta quillboars for him.
Den we finally made it to da Crossroads, and I went to check out oases and unusual plant growth and such.
And onwards from de Northern Barrens!
De problem now is, da Horde is now tellin' me I gots to go to Ashenvale and to Azshara, so's off I went.
Ashenvale meant seein' a whole lotta cut down trees, Azshara meant a land half blown up by da Bilgewater goblins already, and dey both meant fightin' against da night elves.
I be a good proper Darkspear troll, meanin' I got lotsa stories when growin' up about how elves of any sort are nasty pieces of work what took all de troll land away tousands of years ago. Dunno how much of dat is true, 'specially considerin' how most trolls dese days don't seem dat interested in takin' all dat land back. Still, I not be likin' elves dat much.
'xcept, dey're only defending demselves against Warchief Clefthoof-Dung-For-Brains, and showin' us whatfor. Like us defendin' against da incursions of da Alliance in Durotar. Also, I not be a big fan of all de totally unnecessary cuttin' down of de trees, even if it is a good way to annoy de elves. I was findin' myself torn, and actually on de side of da elves for once.
Dat's another thing against Warchief Clefthoof-Dung-For-Brains. He be such a moron he went and made me kinda sorta side wit' da elves! How is dat even possible, I wants to know.
Groups and instances
I done gone through Ragefire Chasm, de Wailing Caverns, and de Deadmines, usin' my recently-learned bear form. I not bein' much of a kung-fu bear yet, only knowin' two attacks, though I can scare people witless wit' a huge big demoralisin' roar right in de face, and make myself scary and threatenin' wit' dis really nasty growlin'. Makes 'em want to fight me rather than anybody else.
Dere been a couple of mishaps, where de others charge ahead and start hittin' baddies before I can even do my scarier-than-I-really-am trick, and den dey go and get all offended when de baddies splat dem before I've even had a chance to get de baddies' attention. Den de others in da group go and blame me.
Hello, Mister Fancy Pants Mage What Have Fire Oozing Out Of His Hair, when a baddie gets hit by great big flamin' balls of fire, he not so interested in de big ferocious bear desperately running at him tryin' to get his attention, he lookin' for da mage in de back in his sissy dress. P'raps next time, you could wait until I start hittin' things before unloading great big flamin' balls of firey death?
'xcept den everyone turned to da Tauren Paladin and bascially said, "She sucks, you tank."
Gee, way to make a girl feel needed, you morons.
I am glad to say I left dem morons behind, and went and found another, much more sensible, group, and dat we den went our merry way through de Deadmines wit' almost noone dyin' and people actually bein' sensible about lettin' me hit things first.
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